Why You Can’t Have It All
I’m staring at my vision board as I write.
It’s covered in CityGirls, each woman posing against a backdrop of the metropolis.
These images nurture me.
They remind me of an exciting life, where opportunity lay between each landmark and the chaos of the City meant I never felt alone.
There’s something very comforting about chaos.
But many of us create it in order to destroy and sabotage what we’d like to experience most.
Whether through an excessive workload, disordered eating, lack of finances or a home filled with clutter, chaos in any area, is a constant reminder that we can’t “have it all” .
My home is a reflection of my daily chaos.
With mess that always needs tidied, I have permission not to write, nor to create and experience all that I desire.
I hate this chaos, it makes me feel dirty and ashamed that I don’t have my shit together as I’m taught is possible for me.
Often I’ve envied people with really tidy homes or work spaces, wondering how they managed to be so “organised”.
I’ve comforted myself by observing that most of my heavier friends and colleagues have tidier environments than they do bodies and it’s always better to look good, right?
Then I wonder how is it even possible to have it all?
I don’t see order in all areas of anyone’s life that I know.
Chaos , mess and disorder is a powerful strategy, we unconsciously employ.
With so much chaos in our life we don’t have time to address the guilt and shame we feel over letting others down, never mind the career change we’d like to make.
Order can be very disconcerting for many of us, especially the Parisienne CityGirl.
Who is she without constant disarray in her life?
With order in our environment, routine and eating habits, we can feel exposed.
No longer having the excuse of stress and mess or a chaotic City life we have more clarity, more energy and a tidy space in which to create.
And this is perhaps our greatest fear.
For it is in this creativity we find our potential, our true purpose and ultimately our power .
And as we lose hold of our chaos we are faced with making way for the new and the career opportunities we truly desire.
Tips on how to reduce chaos in your home and perhaps your life.
1. When you clean, just clean. Don’t plan, don’t have your mind on the next task as you’re doing the current task, don’t listen to a podcast or watch TV as you’re doing the task at hand. Just wipe. Just sweep. Just declutter. Just wash, just rinse.
2.Pay attention to your thoughts, body, actions. Practice focusing your attention: on the rag, on the broom, on the dust. But also notice your thoughts: are you thinking about other things? Notice everything about the moment, immerse yourself in the moment.
3.Do your work with gratitude and compassion. Before you start, remember to be grateful for what you have, for being able to clean or declutter. Be grateful for the people you have in your life, and remember why you’re grateful for them. Then remember you’re cleaning out of compassion: for the people in your life.
Don’t leave me alone here Ladies, in which area do you see chaos in your life most? Comment and connect below.
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Fri March 8th, Mayfair.
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